FDA: Cocks must ring True!

From the Star-Telegram comes this tale of government idiocy gone wild:

Penis enlargers and constricting rings to maintain erections can be seized at U.S. borders, U.S. regulators said Thursday, citing inadequate safety labels.

The devices have inadequate directions for use and can have harmful effects, from rupturing blood vessels to causing gangrene of the penis, the Food and Drug Administration said in guidance to import inspectors posted on the agency’s Web site. The guidance was a revision to guidelines on "external penile rigidity devices" the FDA published in 2004.

“Basically, the labeling of these devices falsely states or implies they will treat impotence, prolong erection, and increase the dimensions of the penis,” the FDA said in the new notice.

The FDA said such devices fall into several categories:

Mechanical stretching devices, which "employ weights or lines tied to other parts of the body such as the knee, to affect tension on the penis.

Vacuum operating devices, "those employing a sealing principle in the area of the base of the penis and an evacuation mechanism to drop the atmospheric pressure around the penis, thereby affecting increased blood flow."

Constrictive rings, which "constrict the base of the penis after erection has been achieved and cause the erection to be maintained by blocking the normal circulation of blood from the penis."

Supportive devices, which "function as a splint or cradle in order to maintain a resumblance of turgidity."

Quickies

They were put off for a while, but things appear to be reaching a boiling point in Turkey with regards to the PKK and their Iraqi cohorts. I've been expecting this for quite some time. I wonder if the US will try to turn this into a win for themselves by getting the PKK to focus on Iranian territory more and ignore Turkey for the time being?

Iraq's government has decided to remove immunity for foreign security forces. It's about time and it comes on the news that the Blackwater folks received immunity from prosecution from our State Department officials.

More on Iraq: Their largest dam is in danger of collapsing, according to U.S. officials. The Iraqi's insist that the danger is not imminent and that they are addressing it. A 65 foot wave could swamp Mosul.

The UK pound hit a 26 year high against the dollar. It still has a ways to go before it sees the highs of 1980 and 1981, but we're close enough that we can begin discussing them again. For those old enough to remember, those years weren't exactly bell weather, celebratory years for the U.S. economy. Reagan and Thatcher may be praised by some these days, but many of us remember those as grave years. Nice job, Bush and Co!

Texas - you know, conservative Bush country - has just produced a report (668 pages long, mind you) that declares that the state produces too many reports. The producers of this latest report want to assure folks that their work is vital:

For the report to be effective, it must be ongoing

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Now playing: Tom Middleton - Shinkansen
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NJ Pension fund

Behold the tip of the pension fund scandal looming on the horizon in the U.S. We saw a tip of the corporate scandals appear last year, now come the states with more corporate to follow. From the NY Times:

In 2005, New Jersey put either $551 million, $56 million or nothing into its pension fund for teachers. All three figures appeared in various state documents — though the state now says that the actual amount was zero.

...The state has long acknowledged that it has been putting less money into the pension fund than it should. But an analysis of its records by The New York Times shows that in many cases, New Jersey has overstated even what it has claimed to be contributing, sometimes by hundreds of millions of dollars.

...State officials say the fund is in dire shape, with a serious deficit. It has enough to pay retirees for several years, but without big contributions, paid for by cuts elsewhere in the state’s programs, higher taxes or another source, the fund could soon be caught in a downward spiral that could devastate the state’s fiscal health. Under its Constitution, New Jersey cannot reduce earned pension benefits.

The Times’s examination of New Jersey’s pension fund showed that officials have taken questionable steps again and again. The state recorded investment gains immediately when the markets were up, for instance, then delayed recording losses when the markets were down. It reported money to pay for health care costs as contributions to the pension fund, though that money would soon flow out of the fund. It claimed it had “excess” assets that allowed it to divert required pension contributions to other uses, like providing financial assistance to poor school districts.

...State law requires New Jersey’s seven pension plans, large and small, for various types of public employees, to be funded according to actuarial standards. Over the last decade, though, the Legislature has passed, and various governors have signed, a series of amendments to statutes that allow smaller contributions or none. These were justified by various maneuvers and approved with little scrutiny. In interviews, officials of the Treasury said the changes were made at the behest of the Legislature, while legislators faulted the Treasury.

In other words, incompetence at all levels of government. The so-called business men and women who are often elected based, in part, on their alleged acumen for dealing with finances are failing the system and have been doing so for decades.